Today's funny

WHEN INSULTS HAD CLASS

"He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire."

~ Winston Churchill

"He can compress the most words into the smallest idea of any man I know."

~ Abraham Lincoln

"Thank you for sending me a copy of your book; I'll waste no time reading it."

~ Moses Hadas

"A modest little person, with much to be modest about."

~ Winston Churchill

"I've had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn't it."

~ Groucho Marx

"He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends."

~ Oscar Wilde

"I am enclosing two tickets to the first night of my new play; bring a friend.... if you have one." George Bernard Shaw to Winston Churchill

"Cannot possibly attend first night, will attend second... if there is one."

~ Winston Churchill, in response

"I feel so miserable without you; it's almost like having you here."

~ Stephen Bishop

"He is a self-made man and worships his creator."

~ John Bright

"He is not only dull himself, he is the cause of dullness in others."

~ Samuel Johnson

Today's Funny

Nobody Job

This is a story about four people named Everybody, Somebody, Anybody and Nobody.

There was an important job to be done and Everybody was sure that Somebody would do it. Anybody could have done it, but Nobody did.

Somebody got angry about this, because it was Everybody's job.

Everybody thought Anybody could do it, but Nobody realized that Everybody wouldn't do it.

It ended up that Everybody blamed Somebody when Nobody did what Anybody could have done!