"There is nothing worse than aggressive stupidity."
~ Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
"If life was fair, Elvis would be alive and all the impersonators would be dead."
~ Johnny Carson
"I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me."
~ Fred Allen
"It is by the goodness of God that in our country we have those three unspeakably precious things: freedom of speech, freedom of conscience, and the prudence never to practice either of them."
~ Mark Twain
"Santa Claus has the right idea. Visit people only once a year."
~Anonymous
"Success didn't spoil me, I've always been insufferable."
~ Fran Lebowitz
"Pain is inevitable. Suffering is optional."
~ M. Kathleen Casey
"If ignorance is bliss, why aren't more people happy?"
~ Anonymous
