The only thing that interferes with my learning is my education.
~ Albert Einstein
Wednesday, November 19, 2008
Tuesday, November 18, 2008
If you like pun jokes...
A pastor who was badly overworked went to the local medical center and was able to have a clone made. The clone was like the pastor in every respect--except that the clone used extraordinarily foul language. The cloned pastor was exceptionally gifted in many other areas of pastoral work, but finally the complaints about the dirty language were too much.
The pastor was not too sure how to get rid of the clone so that it wouldn't look like murder. The best thing, he decided, was to make the clone's death look like an accident. So the pastor lured the clone onto a bridge in the middle of the night and pushed the clone off the bridge.
Unfortunately there was a police officer who happened by at that very moment and arrested the pastor for...
"making an obscene clone fall."
Thanksgiving exercise
EXERCISE FOR OLDER ADULTS IN PREPARATION FOR THANKSGIVING
Begin by standing on a comfortable surface, where you have plenty of room at each side.
With a 5-lb. potato sack in each hand, extend your arms straight out from your sides and hold them there as long as you can. Try to reach a full minute, and then relax.
Each day, you'll find that you can hold this position for just a bit longer.
After a couple of weeks, move up to 10-lb. potato sacks.
Then try 50-lb. potato sacks and then eventually try to get to where you can lift a 100-lb. potato sack in each hand and hold your arms straight for more than a full minute.
After you feel confident at that level, put a potato in each of the sacks.
Today's funny:
"Forbidden fruit creates many jams."
Thanks to Mikey's funnies
Monday, November 17, 2008
I resign...
"I sent the club a wire stating, PLEASE ACCEPT MY RESIGNATION. I DON'T WANT TO BELONG TO ANY CLUB THAT WILL ACCEPT ME AS A MEMBER."
~ Groucho Marx
Saturday, November 15, 2008
Bud's World
Director of Purchasing: Lois Bidder Instrument repairman: Anita Hammer Attorney: Gil T. Azell
The children had all been photographed, and the teacher was trying to persuade them
each to buy a copy of the group picture. “Just think how nice it will be to look at it when you are all grown up and say, ‘There’s Jennifer; she’s a lawyer,’ or ‘That’s Michael, he’s a doctor.’” A small voice at the back of the room rang out, “And there’s the teacher; ...she’s dead.”
I was wondering:
Is a chicken crossing the road considered “poultry in motion?”
If you keep trying to prove “Murphy's Law,” will something go wrong?
If you're an atheist and swear on the Bible, have you committed perjury?
When an elevator is overloaded with passengers, who is criminally responsible?
I’ll Bet You Didn’t Know and Didn’t Care…The dot over the letter “i” is called a ‘tittle’
A rat can last longer without water than a camel. (Have you ever seen a lawyer drink a glass of water?)
From the Sheridan Community Chorus Choir Loft
Our next meeting will be Tuesday, 12/2/08 @ 6:00 pm at The Saint John Bosco Auditorium. We are planning to go Christmas caroling in December to nursing homes, hospitals and to those who are “home-bound.” If you know anyone who is “home-bound,” please let us know. Why not go caroling with us? It’s a blast!
Quotes to remember:
“When an opera star sings her head off, she usually improves her appearance.”
~ Victor Borge
Name that instrument
(Answer to last week’s quiz): The earliest forms of this instrument were signaling instruments used for military and religious purposes, rather than for music in the modern sense. The answer is the trumpet.
This week: It is one of the most recent additions to the modern symphony orchestra, first appearing in the mid-19th century, when it largely replaced the ophicleide. (Answer next week).
What do you say to a guitar player wearing a 3-piece suit?
“Will the defendant please rise.”
How can you tell which kid on the playground is the trombone player's kid?
He doesn’t know how to work the slide and he can’t swing!
Why are a violinist’s fingers like lightning?
They rarely strike the same spot twice.
New Horizons Band concert:Wednesday, 11/19 @ 6:30 pm at the Fredonia High School
History of our neighborhood – SUNY Fredonia
The Fredonia Academy was built for about $75.00 and donated materials.
It was located on lot #159 site of the current Fredonia Village Hall and Fredonia Opera House. Fredonia Academy (1826-1867) was originally opened in 1826 as Fredonia Academy under its first principal Austin Smith, the Academy enrolled eight students. The first classes began on October 4, 1826. Within one year the Academy had 136 students, 81 boys and 55 girls. The Academy reached peak enrollment in 1856 with 217 students. Nevertheless, the school was plagued by financial shortages, and was forced to close its doors in 1867.
Bud: (716) 934-7734, email: tubamanbud@gmail.com
For Community Chorus New Horizon Band updates:
www.frombudsworld.blogspot.com
The children had all been photographed, and the teacher was trying to persuade them
each to buy a copy of the group picture. “Just think how nice it will be to look at it when you are all grown up and say, ‘There’s Jennifer; she’s a lawyer,’ or ‘That’s Michael, he’s a doctor.’” A small voice at the back of the room rang out, “And there’s the teacher; ...she’s dead.”I was wondering:
Is a chicken crossing the road considered “poultry in motion?”
If you keep trying to prove “Murphy's Law,” will something go wrong?
If you're an atheist and swear on the Bible, have you committed perjury?
When an elevator is overloaded with passengers, who is criminally responsible?
I’ll Bet You Didn’t Know and Didn’t Care…The dot over the letter “i” is called a ‘tittle’
A rat can last longer without water than a camel. (Have you ever seen a lawyer drink a glass of water?)
From the Sheridan Community Chorus Choir Loft
Our next meeting will be Tuesday, 12/2/08 @ 6:00 pm at The Saint John Bosco Auditorium. We are planning to go Christmas caroling in December to nursing homes, hospitals and to those who are “home-bound.” If you know anyone who is “home-bound,” please let us know. Why not go caroling with us? It’s a blast!
Quotes to remember:
“When an opera star sings her head off, she usually improves her appearance.”
~ Victor Borge
Name that instrument
(Answer to last week’s quiz): The earliest forms of this instrument were signaling instruments used for military and religious purposes, rather than for music in the modern sense. The answer is the trumpet.
This week: It is one of the most recent additions to the modern symphony orchestra, first appearing in the mid-19th century, when it largely replaced the ophicleide. (Answer next week).
What do you say to a guitar player wearing a 3-piece suit?
“Will the defendant please rise.”
How can you tell which kid on the playground is the trombone player's kid?
He doesn’t know how to work the slide and he can’t swing!
Why are a violinist’s fingers like lightning?
They rarely strike the same spot twice.
New Horizons Band concert:Wednesday, 11/19 @ 6:30 pm at the Fredonia High School
History of our neighborhood – SUNY Fredonia
The Fredonia Academy was built for about $75.00 and donated materials.
It was located on lot #159 site of the current Fredonia Village Hall and Fredonia Opera House. Fredonia Academy (1826-1867) was originally opened in 1826 as Fredonia Academy under its first principal Austin Smith, the Academy enrolled eight students. The first classes began on October 4, 1826. Within one year the Academy had 136 students, 81 boys and 55 girls. The Academy reached peak enrollment in 1856 with 217 students. Nevertheless, the school was plagued by financial shortages, and was forced to close its doors in 1867.
Bud: (716) 934-7734, email: tubamanbud@gmail.com
For Community Chorus New Horizon Band updates:
www.frombudsworld.blogspot.com
Band concert
The New Horizons Band of Western New York will present a Fall Concert at 6:30 p.m. on Wednesday, November 19 at Fredonia High School Auditorium in Fredonia, N.Y. The concert is free, but the band would appreciate donations of non-perishable food that will be donated to the Food Pantry of the Chautauqua County Rural Ministry.
The NHB Saxophone Quartet will open the concert with the National Anthem. Other
ensembles will be a brass quintet (I'm the best tubist in this group), woodwind ensemble, brass chamber ensembles, and s German "oom-pah" band (I am the "oom") will also perform.
Friday, November 14, 2008
Unfair competition
"Organized crime in America takes in over forty billion dollars a year and spends very little on office supplies."
~ Woody Allen
Thursday, November 13, 2008
Thought for the day...
"For every action, there is an equal and opposite criticism."
"Trouble is inevitable, misery is optional."
Wednesday, November 12, 2008
Big Bore Brass Tuba Choir
The Big Bore Brass Tuba Choir will be performing on Sunday, November 23 @ 3:00 pm at The First United Methodist Church (101 E. Main - Rt. 20 in Westfield).
This powerful ensemble will include ~ 14 euphonium and tuba players and will be playing everything from Christmas music to Sousa marches.
Don't miss this thoroughly entertaining group performing as part of the Westfield Holly Tour.
For further information call Bud @ 716.934.7734 or tubamanbud@gmail.com
Church phone number: 716.326.3243
Tuesday, November 11, 2008
Veteran's Day Tribute
When America had an urgent need,
These brave ones raised a hand;
No hesitation held them back;
They were proud to take a stand.
They left their friends and family;
They gave up normal life;
To serve their country and their God,
They plowed into the strife...
by Joanna Fuchs
Monday, November 10, 2008
Schedule of upcoming events...
You will note that I keep a schedule of upcoming local events at the top of the blog page.
They are some of the finest local concerts because I will be participating in them.
Bud
Disciplining your children
"Never raise your hand to your children - it leaves your midsection unprotected."
~ Robert Orben
Housecleaning
Cleaning your house while your kids are still growing is like shoveling the driveway before it has stopped snowing.
Saturday, November 8, 2008
Problems...
"We are continually faced with great opportunities which are brilliantly disguised as unsolvable problems."
~ Margaret Mead
Friday, November 7, 2008
Bud's World
Director of Purchasing: Lois Bidder Instrument repairman: Anita Hammer Attorney: Gil T. Azell
The child was a typical four-year-old girl -- cute, inquisitive, and bright as a new
penny. When she expressed difficulty in grasping the concept of marriage, her father decided to pull out their wedding photo album, thinking visual images would help. One page after another, he pointed out the bride arriving at the church, the entrance, the wedding ceremony, the recessional, the reception, etc.
“Now do you understand?” he asked.
“I think so,” she said, “is that when mommy came to work for us?”
I was wondering:
How can there be self-help “groups?”
Why did kamikaze pilots wear helmets?
If you wear an antennae to a wedding, will the reception be better?
If 7-11 is open 24 hours a day, 365 days a year, why are there locks on the doors?
I’ll Bet You Didn’t Know and Didn’t Care…
If you place a tiny amount of liquor on a scorpion, it will instantly go mad and sting itself to death.
(Who was the sadist who discovered this?)
From the Sheridan Community Chorus Choir Loft
We had our pot luck planning dinner on Saturday, 11/1/08 in Sheridan. We must have the very best cooks and bakers in the world! The turnout was truly inspiring and everyone was very enthusiastic to get this community chorus re-started in a new direction. Thanks to all of you who attended. The next meeting will be Tuesday, December 2 @ 6:00 pm at The Saint John Bosco Auditorium (2777 Rt. 20) in Sheridan. We need you and we need you to invite your friends!
Quotes to remember:
“You can't possibly hear the last movement of
Beethoven's 7th Symphony and go slow.”
~ Oscar Levant, explaining his way out of a speeding ticket
“The Irish gave the bagpipes to the Scots as a joke, but the Scots haven't got the joke yet.”
~ Oliver Herford
Name that instrument
Answer to last week’s quiz): This instrument dates
back to prehistoric times. Early forms of this instrument
were made from mammoth tusks and dated from 30,000 to
37,000 years ago. The answer is the flute.
This week: This instrument dates back to at least 1500 BC. It was constructed of tubing bent twice into an oblong shape, The earliest forms were signaling instruments used for military and religious purposes, rather than for music in the modern sense. (Answer next week).
SUNY Fredonia History:
Fredonia Academy (1867)
Old Main - 1 Temple Street (1939)
Mason Hall - (Date unknown)
Bud: (716) 934-7734, email: tubamanbud@gmail.com
Sheridan Community Chorus and New Horizon Band updates
The child was a typical four-year-old girl -- cute, inquisitive, and bright as a new
penny. When she expressed difficulty in grasping the concept of marriage, her father decided to pull out their wedding photo album, thinking visual images would help. One page after another, he pointed out the bride arriving at the church, the entrance, the wedding ceremony, the recessional, the reception, etc. “Now do you understand?” he asked.
“I think so,” she said, “is that when mommy came to work for us?”
I was wondering:
How can there be self-help “groups?”
Why did kamikaze pilots wear helmets?
If you wear an antennae to a wedding, will the reception be better?
If 7-11 is open 24 hours a day, 365 days a year, why are there locks on the doors?
I’ll Bet You Didn’t Know and Didn’t Care…
If you place a tiny amount of liquor on a scorpion, it will instantly go mad and sting itself to death.
(Who was the sadist who discovered this?)
From the Sheridan Community Chorus Choir Loft
We had our pot luck planning dinner on Saturday, 11/1/08 in Sheridan. We must have the very best cooks and bakers in the world! The turnout was truly inspiring and everyone was very enthusiastic to get this community chorus re-started in a new direction. Thanks to all of you who attended. The next meeting will be Tuesday, December 2 @ 6:00 pm at The Saint John Bosco Auditorium (2777 Rt. 20) in Sheridan. We need you and we need you to invite your friends!
Quotes to remember:
“You can't possibly hear the last movement of
Beethoven's 7th Symphony and go slow.” ~ Oscar Levant, explaining his way out of a speeding ticket
“The Irish gave the bagpipes to the Scots as a joke, but the Scots haven't got the joke yet.”
~ Oliver Herford
Name that instrument
Answer to last week’s quiz): This instrument dates
back to prehistoric times. Early forms of this instrument
were made from mammoth tusks and dated from 30,000 to
37,000 years ago. The answer is the flute.
This week: This instrument dates back to at least 1500 BC. It was constructed of tubing bent twice into an oblong shape, The earliest forms were signaling instruments used for military and religious purposes, rather than for music in the modern sense. (Answer next week).
SUNY Fredonia History:
Fredonia Academy (1867)
Old Main - 1 Temple Street (1939)
Mason Hall - (Date unknown)
Bud: (716) 934-7734, email: tubamanbud@gmail.com
Sheridan Community Chorus and New Horizon Band updates
Thursday, November 6, 2008
The generous barber...
One day a florist goes to a barber for a haircut. After the cut he asks about his bill and the barber replies, ‘I cannot accept money from you. I’m doing community service this week.’ The florist is pleased and leaves the
shop.
When the barber goes to open his shop the next morning there is a ‘thank you’ card and a dozen roses waiting for him at his door.
Later, a cop comes in for a haircut, and when he tries to pay his bill, the barber
again replies, ‘I cannot accept money from you. I’m doing community service this week.’ The cop is happy and leaves the shop.The next morning when the barber goes to open up there is a ‘thank you’ card and a dozen donuts waiting for him at his door.
Then, a Congressman comes in for a haircut, and when he goes to pay his bill the barber again replies, ‘I cannot accept money from you. I’m doing community service this week.’ The Congressman is very happy and leaves the shop.
The next morning when the barber goes to open up, there are a dozen congressmen
lined up waiting for a free haircut.And that, my friends, illustrates the fundamental difference between the citizens of our country and the members of our Congress.
Wednesday, November 5, 2008
Sheridan Chorus plans
Our upcoming plans include Christmas caroling.
Many members have committed to sing Christmas carols around our community in the month of December.
I will be contacting all the places where we have sung in the past (nursing homes, hospitals, etc.) If you have any suggestions or contacts, please let me know.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
