The movie patron (Joke)

A man lay sprawled across three entire seats in the posh theater. When the usher came by and noticed this, he whispered to the man, "Sorry, sir, but you're only allowed one seat." The man groaned but didn't budge. The usher became impatient. "Sir, if you don't get up from there I'm going to have to call the manager." Again, the man just groaned, which infuriated the usher who turned and marched briskly back up the aisle in search of his manager.

In a few moments, both the usher and the manager returned and stood over the man. Together the two of them tried repeatedly to move him, but with no success. Finally, they summoned the police.

The cop surveyed the situation briefly then asked, "All right buddy, what's your name?" "Sam," the man moaned. "Where ya from, Sam?" With pain in his voice, Sam replied, "The balcony."

TODAY'S THOUGHT:

A journey of a thousand miles begins with a cash advance.

Clear conscience (Joke)

A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.

Carolyn Dobony is a Grandma!

Andrew James arrived this morning (11/8/07) weighing in at 7lbs. 12 oz.
Everyone is doing fine!
Congratulations Carolyn! (And, of course, Mommy & Daddy)

The Miracle (Joke)

A mangy looking guy who goes into a restaurant and orders food. The waiter says, "No way. I don't think you can pay for it." The guy says, "You're right. I don't have any money, but if I show you something you haven't seen before, will you give me the food?" "Deal!" replies the waiter.

The guy reaches into his coat pocket and pulls out a hamster. He puts the hamster on the counter and it runs to the end, across the room, up the piano, jumps on the keyboard, and starts playing Gershwin songs. And the hamster is really good. The waiter says, "You're right. I've never seen anything like that before. That hamster is truly good on the piano."

The guy downs the hamburger he ordered and asks the waiter for another. "Money or another miracle," says the waiter. The guy reaches into his coat again and pulls out a frog. He puts the frog on the counter, and the frog starts to sing. He has a marvelous voice and great pitch. A fine singer.

A stranger from the other end of the counter runs over to the guy and offers him $300 for the frog. The guy says, "It's a deal." He takes the three hundred and gives the stranger the frog. The stranger runs out of the restaurant.

The waiter says to the guy, "Are you crazy? You sold a singing frog for $300? It must have been worth millions." "Not so," says the guy, "the hamster is also a ventriloquist."

Sheridan Community Chorus

It's not too late to sing with us in our two Christmas concerts.

We have three regularly scheduled weekly chorus rehearsals...

Tuesdays: 7:15 - 8:30 pm [We have church choir rehearsal 6:45 - 7:15 pm (why not join us?]

Wednesdays: 7:30 - 8:30 pm

Thursdays: 7:00 - 8:30 pm

I am also willing to work with singers on Sunday evenings

No excuses! We need you!

Concerts:

Sunday, December 12/9/07 @ 3:00 pm @ St. Joe's R.C. church (1451 Payne Ave. N. Tonawanda, NY)

Sunday, December (12/16/07) @ 7:00 pm @ Sheridan United Methodist church (2679 Route 20 Sheridan, NY)

Bud's World

A compendium of pontifications:

To write with a broken pencil is pointless.
A thief who stole a calendar got twelve months.
When fish are in schools they sometimes take debate.
I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit me.
The roundest knight at King Arthur's round table was Sir Cumference.Police were called to a daycare where a three-year-old was resisting a rest.
A thief fell and broke his leg in wet concrete. He became a hardened criminal.Did you hear about the guy whose whole left side was cut off? He's all right now.

Ways a church choir director tells someone they can’t sing:
“I’m sorry, we’ve run out of choir robes.”
“We still need good people for the handbell choir.”
“You have a unique range – you hit both notes well.”
“Did you know there is a new Bible study starting the same
night as choir practice, I think you’d get a lot from it.”

Wit or Wisdom
“Life is a compromise of what your ego wants you to do,
what experience tells you to do, and what your nerves let you do.”
~ Bruce Crampton
“A man wrapped up in himself makes a very small bundle.”
~ Benjamin Franklin
“Live in such a way that those who know you but don’t know God
will come to know God because they know you.”
~ Unknown
“A narrow mind and a wide mouth usually go together.”
~ Unknown
“Even if you’re on the right track, you’ll get run over if you just sit there.”
~ Will Rogers

Today in history November 4

1980 – Ronald Regan defeated President Jimmy Carter in a landslide presidential election
1973 – New Orleans Saints got their 1st shutout victory defeating the Buffalo Bills 13 – 0
1952 – Dwight Eisenhower defeated Adlai Stevenson becoming the 34th U.S. President
1939 – The very 1st air conditioned automobile (The Packard) was exhibited in Chicago
1924 – Nellie Taylor Ross was elected the 1st female governor in the U.S. (Wyoming)
1884 – Grover Cleveland, from Buffalo, defeated James Blaine for his 1st Presidential term
1879 – James Ritty patented the 1st cash register to combat the thieving bartenders in his Ohio saloon
1842 – Abraham Lincoln married Mary Todd in Springfield, Illinois

Church office: (716) 672-2048, Bud: (716) 934-7734, email: tubamanbud@gmail.com
www.frombudsworld.blogspot.com

History of the Hymns

‘Rescue the Perishing’ (1869) Page 591
Words: Frances “Fanny” Jane Crosby (1820 – 1915)
Music: William Howard Doane (1832 - 1915)
Fanny Crosby was sixty years old when she visited Chicago’s Bowery Mission for the first time in 1880. She little dreamed that it would provide the inspiration for one of her most popular religious poems.
When asked to speak at the close of the service, she rose and said, “There may be a man here who has gone as far as a man can go. If he is present, I want to shake hands with him.” A man did come forward, and finally accepted Christ as Savior.
Following that initial visit, Fanny Crosby brought many lost souls back into the joy of the Kingdom of God. On another evening that same year she gave this invitation, “If there is a lad here, who has wandered from his mother’s Christian teachings, I would like to pray with him at the altar at the close of the service.”
A young man came forward and they prayer together. He rose from his knees with a new light in his eyes, and said, “Now I can meet my mother in heaven for I have found her God.” Later a friend remarked, “Isn’t it wonderful what these rescue missions are doing?”
Fanny could hardly wait to get home to her desk and begin writing. —Ernest K. Emurian

Meanwhile…1869…138 years ago…in the United States…
President: Ulysses S. Grant…V.P.: Schuyler Colfax
Gambling was legalized in Nevada
The waffle iron was patented in Troy, NY
Charles Elmer Hires sold his 1st root beer in Philadelphia, Pa.
The 1st college football game was played (Rutgers vs. Princeton)
George Westinghouse patented the steam power brake
Thomas Edison patented the electric voting machine
Dr. Thomas B. Welch, a wine steward at a church,
“pasteurized” grape juice to produce unfermented wine.
Major General William F. Rogers was mayor of Buffalo
The “skew” arch on Jackson Street in Silver Creek was built

"Friendship"

You can make more friends in a month by being interested in them
than in ten years by trying to get them interested in you.
-Charles Allen

Sheridan Community Chorus

Please! Please! Please! Please! Please!
Listen to your PracticeTrax everyday.
This is the most efficient way to learn your part.

HALLOWEEN (Joke)

Tap-Tap-Tapping in the Cemetary

Two men were walking home after a Halloween party and decided to take a shortcut through the cemetery just for laughs.

Right in the middle of the cemetery, they were startled by a tap-tap-tapping noise coming from the misty shadows. Trembling with fear, they found an old man with a hammer and chisel, chipping away at one of the headstones.

"Holy cow, Mister," one of them said, after catching his breath, "You scared us half to death! We thought you were a ghost! What are you doing working here so late at night?"

"Those fools!" the old man grumbled. "They misspelled my name!"

Sheridan Community Chorus

UPCOMING CONCERTS:

Sunday, December 9, 2007 @ 3:00 pm St. Joseph's Roman Catholic church (1451 Payne Ave. in N. Tonawanda, NY)

Sunday, December 16, 2007 @ 7:00 pm @ Sheridan United Methodist church (2679 Route 20 in Sheridan, NY)

Bats in the church (Joke)

Three pastors were having lunch in a diner.

One said, "You know, since summer began, I've been having trouble with bats in my loft and attic at church. I’ve tried everything--noise, spray, cats--nothing seems to scare them away."

Another said, "Me too. I've got hundreds living in my belfry and in the attic. I've even had the place fumigated, and they won't go away."

The third said, "I baptized all mine, and made them members of the church. Haven't seen one back since!"

Bud's World

JOB HISTORY

My first job was working in an orange juice factory, but I got canned...couldn't concentrate. Then I worked in the woods as a lumberjack, but I just couldn't hack it, so they gave me the ax. After that I tried to be a tailor, but I just wasn't suited for it...mainly because it was a so-so job. Next I tried working in a muffler factory but that was too exhausting. I wanted to be a barber, but I just couldn't cut it. Then I tried to be a chef -- figured it would add a little spice to my life, but I just didn't have the thyme. I attempted to be a deli worker, but any way I sliced it, I couldn't cut the mustard.

From the Choir Loft
To make it easier for more people to be a part of our ministry, we have three rehearsals / week to make it more convenient for people to attend one or more of our rehearsals. Tuesday evenings (7:15 – 8:30 PM), Wednesday evenings (7:45 – 8:30 PM), and Thursday evenings (7:00 – 8:30 PM). We are rehearsing in order to present our Christmas musical: “Noel.” We will be presenting it at St. Joseph’s Roman Catholic Church (North Tonawanda) and at Sheridan United Methodist church. We would love to have you join us! For further information contact Bud @ 716.934.7734 or tubamanbud@gmail.com

The “Saint”
There were two evil brothers. They were both rich and used their money to hide their sinful ways from the public eye. They even attended the same church and “appeared” to be perfect Christians. Then, their pastor retired and a new one was hired. Not only could the new pastor see right through the brothers’ deception, but he also spoke well and true, and the church started to swell in numbers. A fundraising campaign was started to build a new sanctuary.
All of a sudden, one of the brothers died. The remaining brother sought out the new pastor the day before the funeral and handed him a check for the entire amount needed to finish paying for the new building. “ I have only one condition,” he said. “At his funeral, you must say my brother was a saint.” The pastor gave his word and deposited the check.
The next day at the funeral, the pastor did not hold back. “He was an evil man,” he said. “He cheated on his wife and abused his family.” After going on in this vein for a short time, he concluded with, “But, compared to his brother, he was a saint.”

Today in history
(October 28)
1975 – Calvin Murphy (Houston Rockets) began his NBA free-throw streak of 58 consecutive games
1965 – The 630 foot “Gateway Arch” in St. Louis, Missouri was completed
1962 – Nikita Krushev ordered the withdrawal of missiles from Cuba ending the Cuban missile crisis
1959 – The Buffalo Bills entered the AFL (Sunday afternoons have never been the same!)
1936 – Franklin Roosevelt re-dedicated the Statue of Liberty on its 50th anniversary
1886 – The Statue of Liberty was dedicated by President Grover Cleveland
1858 – Macy’s Department Store 1st opened in NYC
1636 – Harvard University was founded in Cambridge, Massachusetts
Church office: (716) 672-2048, Bud: (716) 934-7734, email: mailto:tubamanbud@yahoo.com
http://www.frombudsworld.blogspot.com/

History of the Hymns

October 28, 2007
‘Just As I Am, Without One Plea’ (1835) Page 357
Words: Charlotte Elliott (1789 – 1871)
Music: William Batchelder Bradbury (1816 - 1868)

Charlotte Elliott’s brother, Rev. Elliott, was planning the building of a school for daughters of clergymen. Charlotte was then 45 years old, an invalid, and could not help with the project. A special program had been scheduled to help in the fund-raising.
That night she could not sleep and started doubting if she ever would be useful to the Lord. The next day, everyone went to the program and she was left alone.
As she thought of her weakness, she realized that since salvation was not of works, her Christian life was also to be by faith and trust, that God accepts the weakest person. And taking up her pen, she wrote this hymn of commitment.
Charlotte’s brother, Rev. Elliott once said of his sister: “I hope I will be permitted to see some of the fruit of my spiritual labor, but I feel that far more has been done by a single hymn of my sister’s.”

Meanwhile…1835…172 years ago…in the United States…
President: Andrew Jackson…V.P.: Martin Van Buren
Texans declared independence from Mexico
P.T. Barnum and his circus began their 1st U.S. tour
Samuel Clemens (Mark Twain) was born in Florida, Missouri
The 1st edition of the New York Herald was published (price 1¢)
Fire consumed over 600 buildings in NYC at a cost of $20 million
Henry Burden received a patent for his horseshoe mfg. machine in Troy, NY
The Liberty Bell cracked again at the funeral service of a US Supreme Court judge
Andrew Carnegie was born to a poor family (would be worth estimated $350 million)
Richard Lawrence’s 2 pistols misfired in a failed assassination attempt on Pres. Jackson
Building materials were delivered to the home of William Brown
for the construction of the Sheridan Methodist Church

Ref. HymnHistories Cyberhymnal WebEdelic DMarie TanBible Wikipedia BuffaloHistory.com

Sheridan Community Chorus

Chorus members:
Please listen to your PracticeTrax everyday!
It's an easy, convenient way to learn your parts to the Christmas musical.

The End Is Near (Joke)

A local priest and a pastor were fishing on the side of the road. They thoughtfully made a sign saying, "The End is Near! Turn yourself around now before it's too late!" and showed it to each passing car.

One driver who drove by didn't appreciate the sign and shouted at them, "Leave us alone, you religious nuts!"

All of a sudden they heard a big splash, looked at each other, and the priest said to the pastor, "You think maybe we should have just said 'Bridge Out' instead?"

Sheridan Community Chorus

New chorus rehearsal dates & times...

Tuesdays: 7:15 - 8:30 PM

Wednesdays: 7:30 - 8:30 PM

Thursdays: 7:00 - 8:30 PM

All rehearsals at...

Sheridan United Methodist Church 2679 East Main Road (Route 20) Sheridan, NY 14135

Come to all or as many as you can.

Invite others to join us!

For further information, contact Bud @ 716.934.7734 or tubamanbud@gmail.com

Bud's World

Job history
My best job was being a musician, but eventually I found I wasn't noteworthy. I studied a long time to become a doctor, but I didn't have any patience. Next was a job in a shoe factory - I tried but I just didn't fit in. I became a professional fisherman, but discovered that I couldn't live on my net income. I managed to get a good job working for a pool maintenance company,
but the work was just too draining. I got a job at a zoo feeding giraffes, but I was fired because I wasn't up to it. So then I got a job in a workout center, but they said I wasn't fit for the job. After many years of trying to find steady work, I finally got a job as a historian
until I realized there was no future in it. My last job was working at Starbucks, but I had to quit because it was always the same old grind.So, then I retired...and found out I was perfect for the job!

From the Choir Loft
Church choir rehearsals are Tuesday evenings 6:45 – 7:15 PM in the Sheridan United Methodist church sanctuary. Why not plan joining us…we’re always looking for more singers…no auditions necessary!
Our Sheridan Community Chorus is now rehearsing twice/week. Tuesday evenings (7:15 – 8:30 PM), and Thursday evenings (7:00 – 8:30 PM). We are now rehearsing in preparation for our Christmas musical in December. We will present this dynamic musical at St. Joseph’s Roman Catholic Church in North Tonawanda on Sunday, 12/9 @ 3:00 PM. And at Sheridan United Methodist Church on Sunday, 12/16 @ 7:00 PM. We could use your help. For further information, please contact Bud at 716.934.7734 or tubamanbud@gmail.com

I was just wondering…

“Why does the psychic hotline ask for your credit card number?”
“Do you sometimes feel as if you’re marching behind the elephants in the parade of life?”


Today in history
(October 21)

1997 – Elton John’s musical tribute to Diana sold over 318 million copies
1994 – North Korea signed a treaty with the Clinton administration to end nuclear projects
1972 – ‘Man of La Mancha’ closed at the Beaumont Theater in NYC after 140 performances
1959 – The Guggenheim Museum by Frank Lloyd Wright opened in NYC
1957 – ‘Jailhouse Rock’ starring Elvis Presley opened
1917 – The 1st American troops saw action on the front lines in WW I
1879 – Thomas Edison perfected the filament light bulb
1492 – Christopher Columbus discovered “America”

Church office: (716) 672-2048, Bud: (716) 934-7734, email: tubamanbud@gmail.com
For Choir & Chorus information visit: www.frombudsworld.blogspot.com

History of the Hymns

October 21, 2007
‘I Know Whom I Have Believed’ (1883) Page 714
Words: Daniel W. Whittle (1840 – 1901)
Music: James McGranaham (1840 - 1907)

Daniel Whittle was named after American politician Daniel Webster. Whittle reached the rank of major during the American civil war, and for the rest of his life was known as “Major” Whittle. During the war, Whittle lost his right arm, and ended up in a prisoner of war camp. Recovering from his wounds in the hospital, he looked for something to read, and found a New Testament. Though its words resonated with him, he was still not ready to accept Christ. Shortly after, a hospital orderly woke him and said a dying prisoner wanted someone to pray with him. Whittle demurred, but the orderly said, “But I thought you were a Christian; I have seen you reading your Bible.” Whittle then agreed to go. He recorded what took place at the dying youth’s bedside:
“I dropped on my knees and held the boy’s hand in mine. In a few broken words I confessed my sins and asked Christ to forgive me. I believed right there that He did forgive me. I then prayed earnestly for the boy. He became quiet and pressed my hand as I prayed and pleaded God’s promises. When I arose from my knees, he was dead. A look of peace had come over his troubled face, and I cannot but believe that God, who used him to bring me to the Savior, used me to lead him to trust Christ’s precious blood and find pardon. I hope to meet him in heaven.”
After the war, Whittle became treasurer of the Elgin Watch Company in Chicago, Illinois.

Meanwhile…1883…124 years ago…in the United States…
President: Chester A. Arthur…V.P.: None
Bread: 2¢/loaf, Milk: 4¢/quart, House: $5,000, Avg. Income: $500/yr.
Favorite tunes: ‘Polly Wolly Doodle,’ ‘The Farmer in the Dell’
The 1st New York Horse Show held (Madison Square Garden)
Original Metropolitan Opera House (NYC) grand opening (Faust)
Race riots took place in Danville, Virginia (4 blacks killed)
US Supreme Court decided Native Americans couldn’t be Americans

Ref. HymnHistories Cyberhymnal WebEdelic DMarie TanBible Wikipedia BuffaloHistory.com

The cost of Heaven (Joke)

The husband and wife were both 85 years old, and had been married for sixty years. Though they were far from rich, they managed to get by because they watched their pennies. Though not young, they were both in very good health, largely due to the wife's insistence on healthy foods and exercise for the last decade.
One day, their good health didn't help when they went on a rare vacation and their plane crashed, sending them off to Heaven. They reached the pearly gates, and St. Peter escorted them inside.
He took them to a beautiful mansion, furnished in gold and fine silks, with a fully stocked kitchen and a waterfall in the master bath. A maid could be seen hanging their favorite clothes in the closet. They gasped in astonishment when he said, "Welcome to Heaven. This will be your home now." The old man asked Peter how much all this was going to cost. "Why, nothing," Peter replied, "Remember, this is your reward in Heaven." The old man looked out the window and right there he saw a championship golf course, finer and more beautiful than any ever built on Earth. "What are the greens fees?" grumbled the old man. "This is Heaven," St. Peter replied. "You can play for free every day."

Next they went to the clubhouse and saw the lavish buffet lunch, with every imaginable cuisine laid out before them, from seafood to steaks to exotic deserts, and free flowing beverages. "Don't even ask," said St. Peter to the man. "This is Heaven, it is all free for you to enjoy." The old man looked around and glanced nervously at his wife. "Well, where are the low fat and low cholesterol foods, and the decaffeinated tea?" he asked. "That's the best part," St. Peter replied. "You can eat and drink as much as you like of whatever you like, and you will never get fat or sick. This is Heaven!" The old man pushed, "No gym to work out at?" "Not unless you want to," was the answer. "No testing my sugar or blood pressure or..." "Never again. All you do here is enjoy yourself."

The old man glared at his wife and said, "You and your bran muffins. We could have been here ten years ago!