Monday, July 21, 2008
Real warning labels for those without common sense:
On a 500-piece puzzle: “Some assembly required.”
On a Frisbee: “Warning: May contain small parts.”
On a toilet bowl cleaning brush: “Do not use orally.”
On a 13-inch wheel on a wheelbarrow: “Not intended for highway use.”
On a toilet at a public sports facility: “Recycled flush water unsafe for drinking.”
On a 6 inch inflatable picture frame: “Not to be used as a personal flotation device.”
On a birthday card for a 1 year old: “Not suitable for children aged 36 months or less.”
I was just wondering…
Shouldn't there be a shorter word for ‘monosyllabic?’
Why does belly button lint not match your shirt color?
If a man is standing in the middle of the forest speaking and there is no woman around to hear him...
is he still wrong?
From the Choir Loft
6 down, 3 to go! We have performed the patriotic musical: ‘Our Flag Was Still There’ at 6 different venues, and have 3 more performances to go! Whose idea was this anyway? I hope he’s learned his lesson!
Wit or Wisdom?
“Happiness is nothing more than good health and a bad memory.”~ Albert Schweitzer
“If you don't know where you are going, you might wind up someplace else.”~ Yogi Berra
"True commitment begins when we reach the point of not knowing how we can possibly go on, and decide to do it anyway."
"Life is like a game of cards. The hand that is dealt you is determinism; the way you play it is free will."
Today in History July 20
1994 – O.J. Simpson offered a $500,000 reward for evidence of his ex-wife’s killer
1977 – A flash flood caused flooding in Johnstown, Pennsylvania, killing 350
1969 – “One small step for man, one giant leap for mankind” - Neil Armstrong stepped onto the moon
1944 – German officers planted a bomb at a meeting with Adolf Hitler attempting to assassinate him
1917 – The draft lottery went into effect in the United States during WW I
1881 – Sioux leader, Sitting Bull surrendered to troops after the battle with Custer at Little Bighorn
1868 – The 1st use of tax stamps on cigarettes
1861 – The 1st major battle of the Civil War took place in Virginia
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