Monday, March 31, 2008

Today's Funny

Lost in the Service

One Sunday morning, the pastor noticed little Johnny standing in the foyer of the church, looking at a large plaque that hung there. After the young man of seven had stood there for some time, the pastor walked up beside him and said quietly,"Good morning, son."

"Good morning, Pastor," replied the youngster, not taking his eyes off the plaque.

"Can I ask you, Sir, what is this for? Why are all these names listed on here?"

"Well, son, these are all the people who have died in the service," replied the pastor.

Soberly, they stood together, staring up at the large plaque.

Little Johnny's voice barely broke the silence when he asked quietly, "Which one, Sir, the 8:30 or the 10:30?"

Sunday, March 30, 2008

History of the Hymns

History of the Hymns March 30, 2008

‘Depth of Mercy’ (1740) pg. 355
Words by Charles Wesley (1707 - 1788)
Music by: Orlando Gibbons (1583 - 1625)

An ac­tress in a town in Eng­land, while pass­ing along the street, heard sing­ing in a house. Out of cur­i­o­si­ty she looked in through the open door and saw a num­ber of peo­ple sit­ting to­ge­ther sing­ing this hymn. She list­ened to the song, and af­ter­wards she heard a sim­ple but ear­nest pray­er. When she finally left, the hymn had so im­pressed her that she pro­cured a co­py of a book con­tain­ing it. Read­ing and re-read­ing the hymn led her to give her heart to God and she re­solved to leave the stage. The man­a­ger of the the­a­ter plead­ed with her to con­tin­ue to take the lead­ing part in a play which she had made fa­mous in other ci­ties, and fi­nal­ly he per­suad­ed her to ap­pear at the the­a­ter. As the cur­tain rose the or­ches­tra be­gan to play the ac­com­pa­ni­ment to the song which she was ex­pect­ed to sing. She stood like one lost in thought, and the band, sup­pos­ing her em­bar­rassed or lost, played the prel­ude over a se­cond and a third time. Then with clasped hands she stepped for­ward and sang with deep emo­tion:
“Depth of mercy, can there be Mercy still reserved for me?”
This put a sud­den stop to the per­for­mance; most were im­pressed, though many scoffed. The change in her life was as per­ma­nent as it was sin­gu­lar. Soon af­ter she be­came the wife of a min­is­ter.

Meanwhile…1740…268 years ago…in the United States…

President: Obviously none - V.P.: Just as obviously none
Fort Niagara is in existence and known as “The Castle”
Mostly French trappers and Native Americans inhabit our region. France had control of the area as a colony. The English colonies along the eastern seaboard are still developing but are claiming all land due west of them, even across the mountains. As English trappers and traders move into the French territory and compete, tensions grow. The French try to convince the Native American tribes that the English will take away their hunting grounds and thereby make allies of most of them.

Ref. Library of Congress crosswinds Town of Hanover Bicentennial BuffaloHistory Tanbible
A little humor
“I have a rock garden. Last week three of them died. ~ Richard Diran

I was just wondering…
Is there another word for ‘Synonym?’
What’s another name for ‘Thesaurus?’
What would a guy named Geronimo yell when he jumped out of a plane?

From the Choir Loft
The chorus did a great job performing the Easter cantata: ‘I’ve Seen Jesus.’ Our chorus presented this beautiful piece in Sheridan and in Cattaraugus, NY. Just think of it! We have been in constant rehearsals since the beginning of September, when we began rehearsing for Christmas. And as soon as we complete our Easter season (April 6 at Holy Trinity R.C. church in Dunkirk), we will begin rehearsals for our patriotic presentation. We could use you. Singing or non-singing help is desperately needed. Please contact Bud (716) 934-7734.

Wit or Wisdom?
“She got her looks from her father. He's a plastic surgeon.” ~ Groucho Marx
“This country has come to feel the same when Congress is in session
as when the baby gets hold of a hammer.”~ Will Rogers
“It pays to be obvious, especially if you have a reputation for subtlety.”~ Isaac Asimov

Today in History
March 30
1992 – The 64th Academy Awards winner: ‘Silence of the Lambs’ w/Anthony Hopkins & Jodie Foster
1987 – The 59th Academy Awards winner: ‘Platoon’ w/Tom Berenger & William Dafoe
1981 – President Ronald Reagan was shot by John W. Hinckley III
1959 – WNED-TV Channel 17 (PBS) in Buffalo, NY began broadcasting
1955 – The 27th Academy Awards winner: ‘On the Waterfront’ w/Marlin Brando & Grace Kelly
1932 – Amelia Earhart became the 1st woman to fly solo across the Atlantic Ocean
1867 – The U.S. bought Alaska from Russia for $7,200,000.00
1858 – A pencil with an attached eraser was patented by Hyman L. Lipman
1533 – King Henry VIII divorced his 1st wife (a sign of things to come)

Saturday, March 29, 2008

Today's Funny

Don't talk to the parrot

Wanda's dishwasher quit working so she called a repairman. Since she had to go to work the next day, she told the repairman, "I'll leave the key under the mat. Fix the dishwasher, leave the bill on the counter, and I'll mail you a check. And by the way don't worry about my dog Spike. He won't bother you. But, whatever you do, do NOT, under ANY circumstances, talk to my parrot! I REPEAT; DO NOT TALK TO MY PARROT!"

When the repairman arrived at Wanda's apartment the following day, he discovered the biggest, meanest looking dog he has ever seen. But, just as she had said, the dog just lay there on the carpet watching the repairman go about his work.

The parrot, however, drove him nuts the whole time with his incessant yelling, cursing and name calling.

Finally the repairman couldn't contain himself any longer and yelled, 'Shut up, you stupid, ugly bird!'

To which the parrot replied, "Get him, Spike!"

See - Men just don't listen.

Friday, March 28, 2008

Chorus/Choir Schedule (3/30 - 4/6)

Week of 3/30/08 - 4/6/08) Rehearsals / Concert

Tuesday, 4/1/08: 6:45 - 7:15 pm: Church choir rehearsal
7:15 - 8:30 pm: Chorus rehearsal (Cattaraugus group will be with us).

Thursday, 4/3/08: No Chorus rehearsal

Sunday, 4/6/08: Chorus concert at Holy Trinity (1032 Central Ave. Dunkirk, NY)
Report time: 5:00 pm
Start time: 6:00 pm

Attire: White/black
Bring choral books & PracticeTrax (hand back in after concert)

Thursday, March 27, 2008

Today's Funny

Getting Into Heaven
After a long illness, a woman died and arrived at the Gates of Heaven. While she was waiting for Saint Peter to greet her, she peeked through the gates. She saw a beautiful banquet table. Sitting all around were her parents and all the other people she had loved and who had died before her. They saw her and began calling greetings to her. "Hello!" "How are you? We've been waiting for you!" "Good to see you!"
When Saint Peter came by, the woman said to him, "This is such a wonderful place! How do I get in?"
"You have to spell a word," Saint Peter told her. "Which word?" the woman asked. "Love." The woman correctly spelled love, and Saint Peter welcomed her into heaven.
About six months later, Saint Peter came to the woman and asked her to watch the Gates of Heaven for him that day. While the woman was guarding the Gates of Heaven, her husband arrived.
"I'm surprised to see you," the woman said. "How have you been?"
"Oh, I've been doing pretty well since you died," her husband told her. "I married the beautiful young nurse who took care of you while you were ill. And then I won the lottery. I sold the little house you and I lived in and bought a big mansion. And my wife and I traveled all around the world. We were on vacation and I went water skiing today. I fell, the ski hit my head, and here I am. How do I get in?"
"You have to spell a word," the woman told him.
"Which word?" her husband asked.
"Czechoslovakia."

Tuesday, March 25, 2008

Today's Funny

Just remember...if the world didn't suck, we'd all fall off.

Monday, March 24, 2008

This week's rehearsals...

Tuesday, 3/25/08 - 6:45 pm - 7:15 pm (Church Choir)
7:15 pm - 8:30pm (Chorus)

Thursday, 3/27/08 - 7:00 pm - 8:30 pm (Chorus)
All rehearsals at Sheridan United Methodist Church

Saturday, March 22, 2008

Sheridan/Cattaraugus Chorus (Patriotic piece)

Our upcoming Patriotic piece: 'Our Flag Was Still There' is from Word Music.
To listen & watch excerpts of the musical, I have included the link to Wordmusic.com
You can listen to excerpts of 6 of the pieces and watch 3 samples of the DVD video.

Our preliminary plans for our Patriotic performances are:

Saturday, June 28 @ 8:00 pm @ The Willowcreek Winery (Sheridan, NY w/5,000 spectators)

Tuesday, July 1 @ 7:00 pm @ St. Columban's On The Lake

Sunday, July 6 @ 7:00 pm @ The Sheridan United Methodist Church (Sheridan, NY)

Sunday, July 13 @ 3:00 pm @ The Cattaraugus Christian Camp (Cattaraugus, NY)


Here's the link for our upcoming Patriotic musical:

Sheridan/Cattaraugus Community Chorus rehearsal schedule

Happy Easter...
This upcoming week's Sheridan Community Chorus rehearsal schedule ...
Tuesday (3/25) 7:15 - 8:30 pm rehearsal at Sheridan United Methodist Church
Thursday (3/27) 7:00 - 8:30 pm rehearsal at Sheridan United Methodist Church

Friday, March 21, 2008

Today's Funny

A Senator arrives in Heaven...
While walking down the street one day a US senator is tragically hit by a truck and dies. His soul arrives in heaven and is met by St. Peter at the entrance.

"Welcome to heaven," says St. Peter. "Before you settle in, it seems there is a problem. You see, we seldom see a politician around these parts, so we're not quite sure what to do with you."

"No problem, just let me in," says the man.

"Well, I'd like to, but I have orders from higher up. What we'll do is have you spend one day in hell and one in heaven. Then you can choose where to spend eternity."

"Really, I've made up my mind. I want to be in heaven," says the senator.

"I'm sorry, but we have our rules."

And with that, St. Peter escorts him to the elevator and he goes down, down, down to hell. The doors open and he finds himself in the middle of a green golf course. In the distance is a clubhouse and standing in front of it are all his friends and other politicians who had worked with him. Everyone is very happy and in evening dress. They run to greet him, shake his hand, and reminisce about the good times they had while getting rich at the expense of the people.

They play a friendly game of golf and then dine on lobster, caviar and champagne. Also present is the devil, who really is a very friendly guy who has a good time dancing and telling jokes. They are having such a good time that before he realizes it, it is time to go. Everyone gives him a hearty farewell and waves while the elevator rises...

The elevator goes up, up, up and the door reopens on heaven where St. Peter is waiting for him.

"Now it's time to visit heaven," St. Peter says.

So, 24 hours pass with the senator joining a group of contented souls moving from cloud to cloud, playing the harp and singing. They have a good time and, before he realizes it, the 24 hours have gone by and St. Peter returns.

"Well, then, you've spent a day in hell and another in heaven. Now choose your eternity."

The senator reflects for a minute, then he answers, "Well, I would NEVER have believed it before...I mean heaven has been delightful, but I think I would be better off in hell."

So, St. Peter escorts him to the elevator and he goes down, down, down to hell.

This time the doors of the elevator open and he's in the middle of a barren land covered with waste and garbage. He sees all his friends dressed in rags, picking up the trash and putting it in black bags as more trash falls from above. The devil comes over to him and puts his arm around his shoulder.

"I don't understand," stammers the senator, "yesterday I was here and there was a golf course and clubhouse, and we ate lobster and caviar, drank champagne, and danced and had a great time. Now there's just a wasteland full of garbage and my friends look miserable. What happened?"

The devil looks at him, smiles and says, "Yesterday we were campaigning. Today you voted."

Thursday, March 20, 2008

Sheridan Community Chorus

REMEMBER:

There is no chorus rehearsal tonight (Thursday, 3/20/08)!
Have a GREAT EASTER!
Our church choir (Sheridan United Methodist Church) will be singing: 'Christ Arose' from the 'I've Seen Jesus' Easter Cantata this Easter Sunday morning service. Warm-up at 10:00 am...service at 10:30 am.
We would love to have you join us. Plus you get to hear Katie Little and I play our horns.

Wednesday, March 19, 2008

The Sheridan/Cattaraugus Community Chorus concert

The chorus presented the full scope of emotion and musicality last night at the concert in Cattaraugus.
They sang softly with hushed reverence but also presented passages with a powerful message of exultation.
The balance of voices was superb and the articulation was commendable.
I was proud of the group (if pride is allowed!)

Tuesday, March 18, 2008

Sheridan/Cattaraugus Community Chorus schedule

Cattaraugus United Methodist Church (3/18)
Report time: 6:00 pm - Start time: 7:00 pm
Attire: White/Black
Bring choral books (duh!) & bottled water


Holy Trinity R.C. Church (Dunkirk, NY) (4/6)
Report time: 5:00 pm - Start time: 6:00 pm
Attire: White/Black
Bring choral books (duh!) & bottled water

*turn in choral books/practicetrax following concert*

Sheridan/Cattaraugus Community Chorus

This was the response from Niles Dening after hearing our Sunday (3/16/08) concert at Sheridan United Methodist.

Niles is an old friend of mine. He is a retired music teacher from the West Seneca school system. Niles is an extremely accomplished musician and is one of the busiest instrumental performers in Western New York.

He is a regular performer in the "Living Singing Christmas Tree" performance at "The Chapel at Crosspointe" in Amherst.


"Hey Bud,
Please share w/ your chorus(s) and the rest of your production crew – Very enjoyable concert tonight. I also thought you made an excellent choice of music for the concert – well written, well orchestrated and well performed. .."
Niles

Thursday, March 13, 2008

Today's funny

WHEN INSULTS HAD CLASS

"He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire."

~ Winston Churchill

"He can compress the most words into the smallest idea of any man I know."

~ Abraham Lincoln

"Thank you for sending me a copy of your book; I'll waste no time reading it."

~ Moses Hadas


"A modest little person, with much to be modest about."
~ Winston Churchill


"I've had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn't it."
~ Groucho Marx


"He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends."
~ Oscar Wilde



"I am enclosing two tickets to the first night of my new play; bring a friend.... if you have one." George Bernard Shaw to Winston Churchill
"Cannot possibly attend first night, will attend second... if there is one."
~ Winston Churchill, in response


"I feel so miserable without you; it's almost like having you here."
~ Stephen Bishop


"He is a self-made man and worships his creator."
~ John Bright


"He is not only dull himself, he is the cause of dullness in others."
~ Samuel Johnson

Today's Funny

Nobody Job
This is a story about four people named Everybody, Somebody, Anybody and Nobody.

There was an important job to be done and Everybody was sure that Somebody would do it. Anybody could have done it, but Nobody did.

Somebody got angry about this, because it was Everybody's job.

Everybody thought Anybody could do it, but Nobody realized that Everybody wouldn't do it.

It ended up that Everybody blamed Somebody when Nobody did what Anybody could have done!

Tuesday, March 11, 2008

Sheridan Community Chorus

Dress rehearsal tonight (3/11/08) @ 7:00 pm at Cattaraugus United Methodist Church.

Regular chorus rehearsal this Thursday, 3/13 at Sheridan United Methodist Church at 7:00 pm.

Concert: Sunday, 3/16 @ 7:00 pm at Sheridan United Methodist Church

Concert: Tuesday, 3/18 @ 7:00 pm at Cattaraugus United Methodist Church

No rehearsal on Thursday 3/20/08

Rehearsal: Tuesday, 3/25 @ 7:15 pm at Sheridan United Methodist Church

Rehearsal: Thursday, 3/27 @ 7:00 pm at Cattaraugus United Methodist Church

Rehearsal: Tuesday, 4/1 @ 7:15 at Sheridan United Methodist Church

Rehearsal: Thursday, 4/3 at Sheridan United Methodist Church

Concert: Sunday, 4/6 @ 6:00 pm at Holy Trinity R.C. church (Dunkirk, NY)

Monday, March 10, 2008

Thought for the day

Age doesn't always bring wisdom. Sometimes age comes alone.

Sunday, March 9, 2008

Snow and cold

The guy who comes to plow out our driveways didn't come early enough for us to make it to church this morning.



Some of you have asked if we've been able to get out of the house yet today...and the answer is YES!

Unfortunately it's always been with the shovel or the snowblower!


The dress rehearsal is still on for tonight. 7:00 pm at Sheridan United Methodist.



I can now see our driveways and sidewalk...unfortunately the Schnauzer is still missing. We're going to send Kacey (the Golden Retriever) out to find the Schnauzer.

Saturday, March 8, 2008

Sheridan/Cattaraugus Community Chorus

DRESS REHEARSAL SCHEDULE:

Sunday, 3/9 @ 7:00 pm @ Sheridan United Methodist Church (report time: 6:45 pm)
Tuesday, 3/11 @ 7:00 pm @ Cattaraugus United Methodist Church (report time: 6:45 pm)




*please remember to bring your choral books (duh!)

If we must cancel chorus plans, please check this blog, or check on WGRZ-TV, WIVB-TV, WKBW-TV or WDOE-AM

Today's Funny

First Time in Church

Mrs. Harrison took her three-year-old daughter, Jenny, to church for the first time. After arriving, the church lights were lowered, and then the choir came down the aisle, carrying lighted candles.

There was silence in the entire sanctuary until Jenny's voice was suddenly heard, loudly singing: "Happy birthday to you! Happy birthday to you..."

Thursday, March 6, 2008

Thought for the day

"Music washes away from the soul the dust of everyday life."


~ Berthold Auerbach

Wednesday, March 5, 2008

Sheridan Community Chorus

We had a great rehearsal last night (3/4) including some members of the Cattaraugus Community Chorus and our narrator (Dick Peters).

The weather was a little "iffy," since there was quite a bit of snow/freezing rain.

Next rehearsal is Thursday (3/6) at Sheridan United Methodist Church @ 7:00 PM.

Today's Funny

Real company signs

At a towing company: "We don't charge an arm and a leg. We want tows."

On a maternity room door: "Push. Push. Push."

At an optometrist's office: "If you don't see what you're looking for, you've come to the right place."

On a taxidermist's window: "We really know our stuff."

In a podiatrist's office: "Time wounds all heels."

On a house's fence: "Salespeople welcome! Dog food is expensive."

At a car dealership: "The best way to get back on your feet - miss a car payment."

Outside a muffler shop: "No appointment necessary. We hear you coming."

In a veterinarian's waiting room: "Be back in 5 minutes. Sit! Stay!"

At the electric company: "We would be de-lighted if you pay your bill. However, if you don't, you will be."

In a restaurant window: "Don't stand there and be hungry. Come on in and get fed up."

In the front yard of a funeral home: "Drive carefully. We'll wait."

At a propane filling station: "Tank heaven for little grills."


~ Mikey's Funnies

Tuesday, March 4, 2008

Today's Funny

Mericful Mountain Lion

A priest was hiking in the woods when suddenly a mountain lion appeared, ready to devour the man whole.

The priest quickly falls to his knees, looks up to the heavens and prays, "Dear God, please teach this lion mercy and give him religion."

A chorus of angels is heard as a beam of light shines down on the mountain lion.

The lion then drops to his knees, looks up to heavens and prays, "Dear God, bless you for this food I'm about to receive."