Monday, June 18, 2007

What the used car ad "really" means! (Joke)

What the car ad claims . . . what it really means~
rough condition . . . too bad to lie about~
parts car . . . beyond repair~
immaculate . . . recently washed~
engine quiet . . . if you use 90-weight oil~
needs minor overhaul . . . needs engine~
needs major overhaul . . . phone the junkyard~
burns no oil . . . it all leaked out~
rebuilt engine . . . cleaned the spark plugs~
drive it away . . . I live on a hill~
drive it anywhere . . . within 10 miles~
desirable classic . . . no one wants it~
rare classic . . . no one wanted it even when it was new~
stored 20 years . . . in a farmer's field~
ran when stored . . . won't start

Church Bulletin Bloopers (Joke)

If you choose to heave during the Postlude, please do so quietly.
We are grateful for the help of those who cleaned up the grounds around the church building and the rector.
Newsletters are not being sent to absentees because of their weight.
Helpers are needed! Please sign up on the information sheep.
Diana and Don request your presents at their wedding.
Lent is that period for preparing for Holy Weed and Easter.